6 things that happen after you deliver your first child.

6/13/2018

If you're a first time mom such as myself, you are probably wondering what to expect after you deliver your beautiful baby. I know I spent that last week before I was induced, thinking about the weeks that would follow. My mom friends told me to expect sleepless nights, and a huge adjustment period. They weren't wrong, but I also noticed other things after I had my son, and I thought I'd map them out in hopes that it would help other first time moms.

Massive weight loss
One thing that isn't completely talked about is the amount of weight you lose after you have your child. Of course, weight loss varies with every person. In my case, I dropped over 22 pounds in that first week home with my son. I was not prepared for such a drastic change. It's been 2 and a half weeks since I had my son and I still find it difficult to dress my smaller body. The first time I left the house, I went through a ton of wardrobe changes because I forgot what it was like to dress a smaller body. For the last several months, I had been dressing my baby bump. Yes, I know, "poor me, the struggle must be so real when you drop a ton of weight after having a baby. I feel so sorry for you *eye roll.*"
Hey, I find this to be a legitimate problem, and I know I'm not the only postpartum mom who thinks so.
Just remember that your body will go through a ton of changes, and you will continue to drop weight. The best thing to do at this point is to dress for comfort. You are going to be busy with a newborn, this isn't the time to dress to impress.
Colic
Colic is an issue that impacts many babies. It can present itself in the first and second weeks of a newborn's life. My son has colic, and it has given me many sleepless nights. I admit, it has been very overwhelming for myself and my son's grandparents. Yesterday I brought him to the doctor and he told me to put him on probiotics. He's already on anti-gas drops, which helps most of the time.
Colic can last anywhere from 2 to 4 months, sometimes longer. If your newborn ends up with colic, you need to stay calm. Do what is best for your baby, and if you need a few minutes to regroup, make sure your baby is in a safe place and go take a few mins to breathe. Make sure you burp your newborn after every ounce of food he or she eats. Do not wake your baby up to eat. He or she will let you know when they are hungry. During those colicky moments, try and soothe your baby. Rub his or her back, sing to your baby, dance with your baby, offer a pacifier, put your baby in a swing/rocker, etc.
If you have any questions about colic, talk to your baby's pediatrician.
Stay calm during this storm, mama. Your baby needs you to be strong for him/her.
Be prepared for projectile pee/poop/vomit.
I really wish someone could have warned me about this part, because it shocked the heck out of me when it happened to my son.
The first week, I was changing my son and while I was getting a clean diaper ready to put underneath him, he projectiled his #2 from the top of his changing table, to the other end of his room. I couldn't believe it. After that moment, I made sure it didn't happen again. I wait until he's done doing what he's doing in his diaper, and then I change him.
If your baby vomits after you feed him/her, stay calm and make sure they are in an upright position so they don't choke. Get them cleaned up first, then place them in their crib.
If you have a son, you will get peed on. It is important that you keep his private area pointed down while you change him.
The soreness after delivery doesn't begin to describe your discomfort.
If you had a vaginal delivery where you tore or had an episotomy, you will be very uncomfortable in the weeks following delivery. That first week will be brutal. I couldn't sit, use the bathroom, or walk without hurting like heck. Also, you will be dealing with the worst bleeding you've ever had 'down there.' Change your pad often and use the bottle that the hospital gives you. I suggest mixing warm water with witch hazel. It definitely helps with the pain, and it keeps you clean. When it comes to healing, take your time. Don't let people rush you, especially if they've never torn completely while delivering a baby.
Don't be afraid to ask for help while you recover and care for your beautiful baby. My parents have been great with helping me while I recover and care for my son. My Church has been amazing as well. The first/second week back home, members of my Church brought over meals for myself and my family. If you have the help, use it. You will need all the help you can get, because this is the most challenging time for both you and baby.
You will fall more in love with your baby.
When you meet your baby for the first time, you learn about what love is. When you bring your baby home and the real work begins, you will fall more in love with him/her. Even when you're sleep deprived, hungry, at your wits end, you will still feel your heart expanding whenever you look at your baby.
I hate being away from my son. Even if I go downstairs to get something to eat, I miss him. If he goes to spend time with his grandfather, I miss him. If I leave the house to get myself medication, or to have some breathing room, I miss him. The first time I left the house on my own, I cried. It's weird how you will want to have a few minutes away to breathe, but you have serious anxiety when you leave your baby, even though they are safe with their grandparents. Even new mamas need an hour or so to breathe. It's normal to miss your baby when you go out, but he/she will be there when you come home.
Don't be stubborn, accept help!
I know I touched on this a bit already, but it's so important that it bears repeating.
This is a very important and challenging time in both you and your baby's life. It isn't weakness to ask for help. In fact, it is showing great strength because you want your baby to develop in a healthy environment. If it's just you, you will burn out quickly (trust me on this one, it happened to me. Then I got my head out of my butt and accepted help). Ask a family member, a friends, a Church member, a significant other, etc for help. Your baby needs you to be strong. Also, if you find yourself feeling more sad than normal, contact your doctor right away. Postpartum depression is something you should NEVER ignore. If you have postpartum depression, do not be ashamed of it. Seek help and if you are prescribed medication, make sure you take it as directed.

The newborn weeks are very challenging. Just know that you're not alone. Also, if we are able to deliver a human into this world, we can handle all the things that follow delivery. We just need to be strong, stay calm, and accept help when it is offered. Be strong and well, mamas!

(photo credit: Shauna Silva. Photo is of my newborn son)