"It was like nothing had ever happened. Tom didn't remember a thing and I was off the hook, or so I thought."
As I entered the room and saw Tom sitting there, it was like nothing had ever happened. He was watching TV like it was any other day. Tom didn't remember a thing and I was off the hook. I smoothed out my dress behind me and sat down on the couch next to him. I tucked a strand of my blonde hair behind my ear and leaned closer to him.
"Sorry I'm late, I was working my nerve to come in."
Tom's eyes went from the TV to me. He took a breath. "Are you okay? You're acting strangely." I was taken aback. How could he be acting like this when he caught me red-handed.
I moved my long blonde hair from one shoulder to another. "I think we should talk about what happened. I would feel better if we talked about it."
Tom turned off the TV and stared his icy blue eyes directly into me, piercing the very depth of my rotting soul. "Please tell me how I can make YOU feel better? Last weekend was the worst weekend of my life. I come home after a lengthy business trip, and I find you in bed with my brother. Did you think I would forget that? I could never forget that. I remember everything. There is nothing you can say that can change what happened."
Tears began to well up in my eyes. "It was just that one time. Please forgive me."
Tom took a sip of his scotch that was on the coffee table. "I cannot forgive someone I both love and hate at equal intervals. I packed your bags. I need you to go."
I took a deep breath and stood up. I turned toward the entrance of the house I shared with Tom for 30 years. He was right to kick me out. As I made my way to the door, Tom followed quickly behind me. "Before you go, I need you to sign these."
Tom handed me a folder of legal documents: divorce papers. I crumbled inside as I looked into his eyes. "Is this what you want, after 30 years of marriage? We can't work this out with counseling and a separation?" Tom shook his head. "I can't trust you. I deserve peace."
I pulled a pen from my purse and guided my shaky hand to the papers. As I handed the documents back to Tom, I regretted everything I did with his brother. How could I be so selfish? Tom was the best husband a girl could ask for, and I destroyed him. I deserved this. I grabbed my items and put them in my car.
As I drove off, I watched the house get smaller and smaller in my rearview mirror. From that point forward, I vowed to never be selfish again.