So, you've been in a relationship with your partner for some time now. Everything is going well! Suddenly, your partner asks if you would like to share locations on your iPhone. Deciding whether to share your location with your partner is a personal choice that depends on several factors, including trust, boundaries, and communication within the relationship.

Here are some considerations that might help you make a decision:

1. Trust: Trust is a fundamental aspect of any healthy relationship. If you and your partner have a strong foundation of trust, sharing your location might not be a big issue.
2. Boundaries: Each person has different comfort levels regarding privacy. It's essential to establish boundaries and discuss what you're comfortable sharing. Respect each other's boundaries and privacy concerns.
3. Communication: Open and honest communication is crucial. Discuss why you want to share your location or why you prefer not to. Understanding each other's perspectives can lead to a compromise that works for both of you.
4. Safety and Security: Sharing your location can be beneficial for safety reasons, especially in emergencies or when meeting in unfamiliar places. However, it's essential to ensure that your location sharing is secure and that both parties feel comfortable with it.
5. Individual Preferences: Some people feel more secure or connected when they can see their partner's location, while others might see it as intrusive or unnecessary. It's important to respect each other's feelings and preferences.
6. Temporary vs. Continuous Sharing: You can also consider temporary location sharing for specific situations or activities instead of continuous sharing. For instance, sharing locations during a trip or when meeting up in crowded places might be more acceptable than constant tracking.

Ultimately, there's no one-size-fits-all answer. Couples should discuss and mutually agree on whether sharing locations aligns with their relationship dynamics and comfort levels. Trust, communication, and respect for each other's boundaries play pivotal roles in making this decision.

Keep in mind that your partner may want to see your location as a means to keep tabs on you. It's an abuse tactic. If your partner is extra clingy, them asking to see your location could be a red flag. Listen to your gut. 

My experience:
I was in a relationship with someone in 2022, and she wanted me to share my location from the beginning. At first, I thought it was sweet. As I look back, it wasn't sweet. She would track where I was and ask me about it. I couldn't dare ask her where she was because when she would go to cheat, she turned her location off. However, I was the bad guy because I went to the store when I was supposed to be home. 
This is called abuse, with a side of gaslighting. We didn't last long, and I was glad when we ended. 

Handling ghosting, which is when someone abruptly stops communicating with you or disappears from your life, can be emotionally challenging.
​Here are some steps to help you navigate this situation:

1. Give It Time: Initially, it's essential to give the person some space. Sometimes, there may be legitimate reasons for their sudden absence, such as personal issues or emergencies. Rushing to conclusions can exacerbate the situation.
2. Self-Reflection: Reflect on the relationship and your feelings towards it. Consider whether this person added positivity or stress to your life. Sometimes, ghosting can be a blessing in disguise, allowing you to move on from a potentially unhealthy connection.
3. Reach Out (Once): If you feel it's appropriate and you genuinely want to understand what happened, send a polite, non-confrontational message expressing your concern and asking if everything is okay. Avoid blaming or accusing them, as this may make them defensive.
4. Respect Their Choice: If they choose not to respond or give vague responses, respect their decision. You can't control their actions, only your own reactions.
5. Lean on Support Systems: Share your feelings with friends or family members who can provide emotional support. Talking about your emotions can be therapeutic and help you gain perspective.
6. Focus on Self-Care: Take care of your physical and emotional well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy and reduce stress, such as hobbies, exercise, or meditation.
7. Limit Social Media Stalking: Avoid obsessively checking their social media profiles or trying to find information about them. This can prolong your emotional distress and is generally unproductive.
8. Learn and Grow: Use this experience as an opportunity for personal growth. Reflect on what you've learned from the relationship and what you'd like in future connections.
9. Move Forward: Eventually, make a conscious effort to move forward with your life. Keep an open heart for new connections and friendships. Remember that not everyone you meet will have the same values and priorities as you do.
10. Recognize Red Flags: In future relationships, be vigilant for signs of potential ghosting. While you can't always predict or prevent it, being aware of red flags early on can help you protect your emotional well-being.
11. Seek Professional Help: If you find it challenging to cope with the emotional aftermath of ghosting, consider seeking therapy or counseling. A mental health professional can provide guidance and support tailored to your specific situation.

Remember that ghosting says more about the person who chose to disappear than it does about you. It's essential to prioritize your own emotional well-being and not internalize their actions. Over time, the pain will diminish, and you will find yourself in a better place emotionally.

Earlier this year, I was ghosted by someone I had fallen in love with. The relationship was toxic from the beginning, but I had 'love goggles' on and did not see what was happening in front of me. This same person cheated on me. It was a painful heartbreak. Instead of wallowing, I poured into my own cup. I began a self-care journey, which consisted of clay masks, sheet masks, foot masks, pedicures, dinners, movies, popcorn, and the occasional glass of Merlot. I processed my emotions and worked through them. Over time, I was able to get over her and move forward with my life. I am currently in an amazing relationship, and it never would have happened if I hadn't poured into my own cup. 
While my ex did me wrong, I harbor no ill will toward her. While I have forgiven her, I did not forgive her for her benefit. I forgave her for me, so I can be free. When you don't forgive someone, they have power over you, and that grows the longer they have that power. The only way to reclaim that power is to forgive them. I'm telling you, it's worth it! Finally forgiving someone who has done you wrong is like taking an energy shot. It brings you to life. It raises your vibration. It's a beautiful feeling!

Trust me, I know it's hard to forgive someone who ghosted you. You want bad things to happen to them. The one thing I can tell you is that you need to reclaim your power. The person that ghosted you lacks a soul, which is why they need your energy. Take that energy back and watch them sink themselves. God/Karma/Life can take care of people far better than we can. Reclaim that power, and move forward!

Falling in love is the most incredible feeling in the world. However, it can also be incredibly lonely if your beloved does not return your affection. You try everything to get this person to love you back, but they are not responding to your advances.

What is unrequited love?
Unrequited love is a longing for a person who does not share your affection. No matter how much you pursue the object of your affection, they will not share your feelings. Even those in a committed relationship can suffer the pain from unrequited love. The person you love could leave you unexpectedly.

Signs that your partner does not reciprocate your feelings:
The sure-fire sign that the one you love does not return your love is a lack of communication. If your partner leaves without giving you a reason why, they are showing you that you are not their priority.
Here are some other signs to look for:

• They cancel plans on you at the last minute.
• They do not respect your time.
• They cruelly criticize you.

What to do when your beloved does not feel the same.
Similar to the 12-step program, the first step to recovering from unrequited love, is to admit that there is a problem.
After you admit to yourself that your feelings are not being reciprocated, the next step is to remove yourself from the situation. This can be quite painful, but removing yourself from unrequited love can open yourself up to loving yourself more. It is the first step toward healing.
Once you remove yourself from the situation, and start loving yourself, an entire world opens up to you. You start smiling more and appreciating everything (and everyone) that you have. In fact, you will begin to see right through people's facades. You will also be open to the type of love that you deserve.
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(Previously published on my examiner.com page)

​Embarking on a new relationship is both exciting and scary. As the relationship grows and matures, you develop a mutual love and trust with your significant other. However, in the age of social media websites, one may wonder if we should share our passwords with our significant others.
Even though you are in a relationship with someone, your partner is entitled to their privacy, and they are entitled to keep their passwords private.
However, there are a few exceptions:

1. If you both have decided to share a social networking profile. In that case, you should be sharing passwords.
2. If one or both of you are ill. In the event that one of you has a health setback, by exchanging passwords, you can notify your partner’s friends of the setback.

Now, if you want your partner’s social media password in order to spy on them, your partner has every right to deny your request. If you feel that your partner is up to something, bringing your partner’s friends and family into the situation by contacting them will make matters worse.
Social networking sites are available for people to stay in contact with friends and family. There is no right or wrong answer in terms of whether or not you should share your passwords with your partner. It all depends on your relationship. If you suspect that your partner is misbehaving, talk to your partner about it. Don’t go behind their back and cause unnecessary drama.

Using your best judgment will help you and your partner enjoy being on social networking sites.
Below are a couple of stats to show you how many people share their passwords with their significant others.

The dating world is a battlefield. Humans are groomed by family and society to look for that one person who can sweep you off your feet. Often times, our friends and family members will ask us about our love lives, and if we are seeing anyone special. If we're not, we groan in response, and roll our eyes at the meddling friend and/or family member.
Many of you may have that friend who will come up to us and tell us that they know someone who would be perfect for us. Our friend asks us to list off what we are looking for in a partner. Our friend goes to our potential partner and asks them what they are looking for. Both parties list the qualities that they are looking for in a partner. Then, the subject of physical appearance is brought up.

When women first begin talking to a guy online, one of the first questions the guy will ask is what the woman looks like. Women may be nervous to answer, so they answer the guy's question with: "What do you look for in a woman?" Guys begin listing their likes and dislikes. They like a woman's eyes, smile, lips, tits, ass, no fupa, etc. In terms of size, you may find quite a number of men whose ideal woman is fit. Some men are adamant about dating a woman who is a specific body type. You may come across men who like their women to have curves.

This does go both ways. When men talk to women online, women want to get an idea of who they are talking to. Some women like a man to be muscular. Some women like to be with men who aren't muscular. With women, we tend to pay more attention to personality than body type (I've dated muscular, skinny, average, tall, short, and overweight people. Douchebags come in all shapes and sizes).

To answer the question of size, and what men and women want, there isn't a right or wrong question. Women tend to factor in a personality before factoring in a man's body type. In terms of men, men are different, and to think that all men want a Victoria's Secret model is rather silly. Some men do fancy the Victoria's Secret models, and that's fine. However, there are men out there that like a little Beyoncé, Scarlett Johansson, Mia Tyler, Tess Holiday, Lizzo, etc.
The physical attributes of a woman spike a man's interest. A personality is what hooks them.
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So, if you're out there in the dating world, just be yourself. Be proud of who you are. You may have to deal with a lot of frogs before you find that prince (or princess). If finding 'the one' is your jam, don't give up. 
In the meantime, fall in love with yourself. Fall in love with your teeth, your stomach, your breasts, your hair, your fupa (ladies, if you have one, don't be ashamed of it. The right partner will salivate at it), your unibrow, your extra bits, your crooked toe, etc. Fall in love with ALL. OF. IT! Once you love and accept yourself, the right caliber of people will be insanely attracted to you. 

​Relationships can be exciting, intoxicating, and overall powerful. But they can be a world of trouble if you allow it to take control over your entire life.

Once you begin a relationship, many people are at risk of spending TOO much time with their new loves, and less time with their friends and family. We've all done it. When things begin to get serious in a relationship, life becomes more of a "we" and less of an "I." While becoming a "we" in life is pretty exciting, you need to remember that alone time in relationships is just as important as together time in relationships.

What I mean is, if you spend TOO much time together, you could grow tired of your love and begin to resent them. Spending time apart is healthy. Let your significant other have some alone time. Let them watch TV on their own, or play computer games by themselves for a few hours. Let them go out with their friends and not go with them. Go out with your friends without your other half. Watch TV on your own. Go for a walk by yourself. Take yourself out.

Just because you are in a relationship, it doesn't mean you stop the relationship you have with yourself. You NEED to keep strengthening that relationship you have with yourself. You need to keep that self-esteem leveled. You need to keep your confidence there. Yes, you want to spend time with the one you love, but, in love, you also need to make sacrifices for the one you love. Give the one you love some space to breath and be on their own for a little bit. You know they love you. You know they are coming home to you. Why spend 24/7 with them when you know you will spend the rest of your life with them?
Also, you need this time alone just as much as they do. Get stuff done too. You know you have stuff to do. Tackle that project that you've been putting off. In no time, that gnawing feeling to go sit by your beloved will fade away and you will be focused on your project. Time will fly by, and you and your beloved will soon reunite, and it will be perfect.

Friends, you NEED boundaries in any relationships, and in marriages. If you love the person(s) in your life, give them the space they need to keep them sane. You aren't neglecting them by giving them the space. You are loving them from afar. :-)

​Jealousy is defined as being an emotion of resentment and insecurity. It is an overwhelming fear of possibly losing something very important to a person.
​When it comes to romance, jealously is an emotion that has the capability to destroy a relationship.  Even though jealousy has the potential to destroy a relationship, can even a little bit of jealousy be healthy?

Why do humans feel jealous in the first place? The overwhelming feeling of jealousy could stem from a childhood trauma. For example: a parent could show favoritism for a sibling, and not the other child. A child may have started feeling jealous when their friends began hanging out with the new kid more, and not them. The origin of jealousy could also stem from a lack of self-esteem. The person could feel inadequate, thinking that their lover would be better off without them. They may think that the waitress serving them is more attractive than they are, which is why their lover was looking at her.

This could make the jealous person lash out at their lover. The feelings of jealousy could drive the jealous person to become a detective: following their lover and accusing their lover of cheating. The jealous person could hack into their lover’s social media profiles, messaging every person on their lover’s friends list. The jealous person could even violently go after the person they suspect their lover of cheating with. This type of jealousy is a relationship destroyer.

However, a tiny bit of jealousy could actually ignite a spark in the relationship. The jealous person could utilize their jealousy by stepping up to the plate and showing their lover how much they mean to them. The emotion of jealousy could make the jealous person want to be a better partner and lover. This could show their lover that their partner would do anything for them. It shows the lover that their partner is grateful to have their lover in their life.
A little bit of jealousy in a relationship is very healthy, if it makes a person a better partner and lover.

​​There is one rule I live by when it comes to relationships: Never stop courting your boyfriend/fiancé/husband or girlfriend/fiancée/wife, even after you have them.